May 6, 2009

Twilight Widower Makes Me Realize I Need to Pay More Attention to Mr. TCA

I am a sh!teous wife...

Thanks to Twitarded, I found Twilight Widowers Anonymous, a support site for husbands, boyfriends, and life partners of Twilight Addicts.

As I read Twilight Widower's hilarious blog post about a Typical Day in the Life of a Twilight Widower , I found my face turning beet red, because I realize that I too have turned my husband into a Twilight Widower.
10:30- I receive yet another e-mail from the wife with more links to the "hilarious" adventures of the Edward Cullen action figures, which other over-30 married women apparently seem to be occupying themselves with instead of taking care of their loved ones. I am happy that the wife has not yet demanded I buy one for her. (Although, I suspect, it is only a matter of time.) (TCA: Oops, Mr. TCA bought me a Plastic Edward already)

12 Noon- I begin to wonder if I am starting to resent Robert Pattinson, but I decide no. I return to vandalizing "R-Pattz" pictures on Photoshop.
(TCA: My husband mentioned Jackson Rathbone's name the other day and knows what Forks is; I'm semi-embarrassed that I've tainted him with Twilight vocab)

1:30 p.m.- I get another e-mail from my wife, asking whether I can get a copy of the The Twilight Saga: The Official Guide on my way home.

5:30 p.m. Arrive home. As usual, no dinner. Wife is re-reading entire Twilight saga, and has isolated herself in our bedroom, saying she has "work to do." (TCA: Guilty^100)
I think that my husband could've written a similar story, and now I feel kind of bad! While the rest of Twilight Widower's post was super-funny, here is the part that made me cringe:
9 p.m.- Am lonely. Consider asking wife to watch Twilight DVD for 7th time. But then, what will we do on date night? Hmmm...maybe I will play Xbox with the teen.
The other night, I was shocked when Mr. TCA actually suggested watching Twilight together, though I know he'd rather be watching hockey playoffs. Was he lonely enough for me that he was willing to endure sitting through Twilight??

Read the rest of Twilight Widower's post here.

Thanks to Twilight Widower, maybe tonight I'll lay off the blog tonight and snuggle with my neglected husband. I think Mr. TCA will thank you.


  1. Awe.
    Yah for Mr. TCA.
    My husband was only a widow during my first reading.
    It was like a fasting.
    I stayed in bed for four days straight reading the four books. I didn't cook, clean, or move.
    Now I have it under control.
    (Except for my addiction to checking Twicrack)
    My husband uses Twilight to bring me back to my happy place.
    I had a terrible day at work yesterday and I came home pretty upset.
    So my husband says, "Let me turn on Twilight for you."

  2. Awwwwwwwww, juju, your husband is so sweet!!

  3. Thanks TCA :)
    And you know what?
    I have to tell you.
    What you do with this blog (wading through the silly stories and presenting us with the good ones) is really amazing. You do us all a huge service.
    Thank you and thank you to Mr. TCA.

  4. Well said Juju! I love you too TCA! This blog makes my day- It's a staple in my morning routine!

  5. Aw, TCA don't beat yourself up! I admit to feeling a little guilty about the time spent on Twi but really, we'll make it up to them. Someday...


  6. Wow this is like reading my own diary..I must admit not only am I a an Addict I am now a Twilight Widower..!

    I have not social life and dont even talk on the phone..
    omg now i feel so guilty lol !

  7. TCA, we love you so don't worry we'll give you 2 hours with your honey.... You'll be missed by your TCA Fans if you are away any longer!! ha ha

    I'm sure Mr. TCA will understand he sounds like a good guy. :)

  8. Oh c'mon! Mr. TCA has it SOOO good! He even got to hang out with the cast in Vancouver with you and everything! What's that??? He doesn't care and hardly even recognized the objects of our collective affections? Oh... Well then... That changes things, I guess...

    Fine, fine, go and have yourself a "Mr. TCA"-centric night off. But don't be away so long that we all start going through withdrawal - lol!

  9. My husband is a widower... Wait till he finds out.

    Totally guilty of my husband saying... "come to bed.... or are you on twicrack??" He will actually say, "good night then whatever..." sad. SaDDer.... When I am watching twilight at night in bed, trying to fall asleep and I think my hubby is asleep until he all of a sudden quotes the movie... "Chillax" WOW.

  10. i'm super lucky, as my husband is reading the books. he no longer wants to watch tv (gasp!) he just wants to read at night. he's happy to watch the movie as often as i am. the only thing i have to watch is making any comment concerning rob being hot. that ticks him off. i have to pretend that i can't imagine what all the hype is. i must be a really good actress cause he's totally buying it :)

  11. Yeah, I have a pretty supportive Hubby until I get overwhelmed with drooling over Rob and then we have problems. Outside of that...we're cool.

    His turning point is when I cared more about what Rob had for dinner than what he was going to have for dinner. He said "I bet you'd cook for Rob". I shouldn't have gotten this dreamy look in my eye when I said "Oh YEAH". Sorry...I had to play that out in my mind...

  12. My husband works nights at the Portland Jetport, so I have unlimited TCA time. When my kids hit the bed at 8, Im literally glued to the computer. LOL!

    My hubby knows I think Robs unervingly beautiful. He brings me home stray magazines as long as Twilight is in it from the planes that passengers leave behind. He's sweet. Poor man.

  13. OK girls, I found the answer for these poor Widowers on this very blog, which I check like, oh I can't admit how many times a day because yes TCA is very discerning. Fanfiction!!! My husband now doesn't know what hit him I'm so turned on by all the fanfics that fill in all the blanks!
    There are gzillions of them. I could give my own recommendations, or go to where the widower post is and a few posts down is one all about the fanfics. or email me at and I'll send you recs. The widowers will now feel like twiwhores. The only thing is, I haven't admitted to my husband why I'm so turned on all the time lately, nor can I blab on about Rob as much as I'd like to. That kinda ruins it for him.

  14. Ahhhh...TCA! GO treat your man to some uninterrupted TCA time---you deserce it for keeping us addicts so well informed!

    My hubby bought me all the books as a gift, and I'm sure sometimes he regrets it. He is in Canada right now, so I had to do a google search to see how close he is to Vancity. Unfortunatly, not close enough for me to convince him to set stalk and get pics. He would think I was possessed!

  15. Thanks for finding this blog - it is sooooo funny (and unfortunately, all too true...)

  16. Thank you for the kind review, TCA.

    I'm glad to hear you'll be spending some time with Mr. TCA tonight. If just one Twilight Widower gets some extra attention out of all this, I have done my job.

    P.S. TCA, your blog is one of my wife's favourites. She reads it every morning. And evening. And afternoon.

  17. My boyfriend read Twilight after I asked him to a hundred times. He said it was okay, but ultimately felt it was soley written for girls. He went to see the movie with me and then said he was glad he read the books before the movie. So we had good conversation talking about the book and movie comparisons. And he doesn't know but there are many instances where I fantasize about being with Edward Cullen when I'm with him... is that really bad? Yeah it is. But my best friend, the one that turned me on to Twilight in the first place said that she has been known to do that on occassion:) If my boyfriend ever knew that he would, well I don't know maybe distroy my Twilight DVD and burn my books...jk!

  18. Oh my Twi-dower is everywhere! I love it.
    So funny, my husband has been laughing like crazy over all this.

    @Twi- I'm sure you are a super wonderful wife & your husband sounds extremely awesome & supportive. :)

    I completely agree that Twilight can become an obsession, but I've been on the receiving end for years now. My husband is a DIEHARD WoW player. Not to mention poker (he's gone right now doing that), sports, and any other random thing. He's completely supportive of all my Twi-love because he knows it's been the other way around. Plus one day he will find something new to obsess about & I'll support him just like he's supporting me...
    Wow that's long & slightly confusing... sorry!

  19. My new boyfriend can play the piano pretty good. So guess what I told him? You guessed compose me a lullaby, duh! LOL. He has yet to do so:( If there was really an Edward Cullen out there we would have to clone can clone vampires right? Geez, that would be a mulit-billion dollar buisiness.

  20. Oh my goodness, this is me to a tee ---- As I at this moment am hold up in the spare bedroom read TCA and about to watch Twilight for like the 30th time!!!!! OH MY!! LOL gotta love it!

  21. That blog is so funny. At lest he has a sense of humor about it my hubby gets irritated if I talk about it to much. Boys! Most of them just don't get it. Your very lucky if yours dose. Oh well. My hubby works late so as soon as I get the kiddos to bed I can obsess over it as much as I want.

  22. I like this Edward cloning idea, Anonymous! The Twiwidowers site is funny. But really it sort of reminds me of the multiple girl friends I have who are porno widows or football widows or video game widows. Now they have something to keep them occupied. I am not sure what purpose their marriages fill with distracted porno husband and the now happily distracted Twilight wife but who am I to judge?

  23. As if I needed one more blog to add to my rotation... oh well Twi-Widower is hilarious!

    Don't feel bad TCA, my five year old is a Twi-Orphan. I'm always using the 'Mommy's working' bit when I am scouring Twilight blogs.

    It's gotten so bad that one day I was putting moisturizer on my face and she says, " Oooh Mommy you're white like Bella' The sad, but hilarious part is that I am African-American.

  24. @TCA--you rock our worlds so I am sure you rock Mr TCAs--I hope you had a lovely evening together. And I thank you profusely for the time you take away from him to entertain us.

    @scentaddict--you are so correct. The whole fanfiction world gifted to me by my fellow Twitards over at Twitarded and on Pillow Biters forum has greatly benefited my husband. It's hard to complain about those kind of benefits.

    Twi-dowers blog is great and has definitely been added to my daily blog rotation as well.

  25. OMG! I love it! I kind of feel a bit guilty .... but I have to read TwiCrack at least twice a day.

    I may show this site to the boyfriend as he is getting a little bit annoyed with me having the How to Be soundtrack on in the car.


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